Up to 64% of women report feeling pressured to have an abortion (Elliot Institute, 2019).
Most people assume women have abortions because they do not want to be pregnant, when in reality, approximately 20% of abortions are unwanted. That means, in the United States, about 172,464 women have unwanted abortions every single year (Jones & Jerman, 2017).
According to David Reardon, Ph.D., leading expert in the after-effects of abortion, up to 80% of women who aborted their baby would have chosen to keep their babies “under better circumstances or if they were supported to do so by their significant other” (2003).
In his extensive research on this topic, Reardon has concluded that many of these women are looking for an excuse to keep their baby. From the findings of his research, he calls for better pre-abortion screening, including to detect if the woman is being coerced.
In a personal testimony, Marguerite shares her experience of having an abortion solely to acquiesce the demands of her abusive boyfriend:
“The Ghost of Grief is ruling my life…. I wanted my baby. I unequivocally wanted my baby. I was a twenty-three-year-old student living with a man who was prone to violence, resorted to violence, loathed violence, was violent. I had recently suffered a breakdown. My friends and my family were absent. He said I did not need them. He took hold of my hand and said that he would be there for me always. But now, we must act responsibly. He said he was not ready for children. He said I was not ready for children…. A week later I was in the hospital for the abortion. I remember the preceding week fairly well. I spent most of it in bed dreaming of my baby. Pretending to myself that if I lay long enough, I’d give birth before the abortion took place…. Protocol had me meet with a doctor. My partner was present. I could not speak. Were they going to ask me if I wanted the abortion? I waited. No questions asked. The day drew nearer and panic set in. I remember one night being so alarmed by pain in my womb that I was convinced I was miscarrying. I ran to the hospital and burst in, tears streaming down my face. “What does it matter?” a nurse scolded. “You’re going to have an abortion anyway.” I slunk away. The day of the procedure.., they proceeded to administer the anaesthetic. I looked into the anaesthetist’s face. I said “no.” But they performed the operation anyway. No last minute absolution in this place.” (from Reardon, 2003).
Significant others are not the only ones guilty of pressuring or coercing their wife or girlfriend into having an abortion. Oftentimes, it is the abortion counselors themselves that pressure her. According to Reardon’s research, inadequate, inaccurate, or biased counseling is associated with more severe post-abortive psychological effects (2003). Consider this testimony from a 39 year old woman who was excited to conceive her fifth child even though she had a copper IUD in place. She was worried about the copper IUD and asked her doctor for information:
“The doctor said he did not know about the copper, but it was definitely a poison. He said I was a very “unusual” woman wanting a baby at thirty-nine and it was unfair to my husband. The doctor would expect his wife to have an abortion under similar circumstances. He said it would ruin our social life and be detrimental to our other four children. I was still worried about the copper IUD. The specialist yelled at me that it did not matter: I had two children already (actually four), I was thirty-nine and had no right to do this to anyone. I was “odd.” He said my husband would probably beat up all the children (he did have a history of violence). I signed the abortion papers with tears dripping over them. Once in the hospital, I decided that once and for all I would insist on information on my copper problem. Eventually a doctor came into my room…. I said I did not want the abortion but had a husband and copper problems and could he give me some info. He said I would have to speak to my private specialist who would not be in until the next morning. At about 9 a.m. the next morning, I asked a nurse when I would see him and was informed he was already in the theatre. I was to be prepped immediately… I was shocked. I was given a pethidine injection and after eleven weeks of avoiding aspirin, artificial colorants, insecticides, this was the final blow. I was wheeled crying through miles of corridors to the theatre feeling defeated…. I thought of getting off the trolley and running and have often wondered if anyone has ever done this. While I was still crying, they said they would give me an injection in the hand. I said, “Won’t anyone save me?” The specialist laughed and that was the end” (from Reardon, 2003).
Joanna also shares her story of coercion and post abortive regret. Coupled with pressure from her clinician who told her she needed to decide quickly whether or not to abort and fear of disappointing her loved ones, she says:
“Everything happened too fast. When I found out I was pregnant I panicked. The woman at the clinic told me I better decide quickly. I was afraid to tell my parents. I wanted to spare my father the disappointment. I knew he would feel that I had gotten myself into this situation. I was pregnant, unmarried and trying to complete a degree in business. Abortion seemed pretty logical. I was not prepared for the feelings of loss and unremitting grief which followed. The whole experience was worse than the most horrible nightmare I could ever imagine. This has been a pain I wouldn’t wish on anyone.” (from Reardon, 2003).
Reardon discusses the findings of a survey in which only 4% of respondents felt that their abortion counselors were helpful and informative. Alarmingly, 67% of the respondents thought that their counselors were biased toward their choosing abortion. Crisis counseling experts agree that women in a state of crisis are vulnerable to outside influences and lack trust in their own intuition and ability to make good decisions. Women experiencing unexpected pregnancies often find themselves in a mental and emotional state of crisis. All too often they are cornered by significant others, abortion counselors, or societal pressure into thinking that abortion is their only choice. One woman illustrates this point:
“I didn’t want to kill my child; I just made the decision to be weak and not care about any of it. I made a decision not to make a conscious choice at all. In fact, Planned Parenthood and all the abortion mills tell you that you have No Choice but to get an abortion. This is the irony of the ‘pro-choice’ rhetoric” Reardon, 2003).
If you or someone you know is feeling like abortion is your only option, know that you are not alone. Pregnancy Resource Centers like Woodbury Options for Women are here for you. We offer free, objective, and non-judgmental options consultations so you can take the time and space you need to make the decision that is right for you. No one should be coerced into having an abortion. Coercion violates the dignity of women – and women deserve better. For more information on your options and the risks of abortion, click here.
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